Sunday, April 24, 2005

Preparing For the End Times

Listening to: A beautiful mix by Lu

OOOOooooohmygod, grrrrrr... who? Wha? Huh? Where's my coffee ferkrissake....?!?!

Still recovering from last night's Genuine Bash and although I have no regrets (quite the opposite), I have battle wounds.

This afternoon I watched some show about the Book of Revelations on the History Channel and of course they feature Tim LaHaye and his "Left Behind" series. According to LaHaye, the pieces are supposedly all in place for the second coming or the rapture or Armageddon or whatever and we all need to get ready and do whatever it is we're supposed to do so that when the big rumble comes so we're not looking at an empty space where our holier-than-thou friend was previously sitting and left wondering how the hell they did that and hadn't they said they were paying for lunch, anyway?

All the signs are in place, folks. Just like they were, oh, twenty years ago and oh yeah, twenty years before that and twenty years before that and on and on and on and every twenty years or so, all the way back until that night when St. John the Divine went to bed after eating some bad Gefilte fish and had hellish dreams. Had St. John taken some Alka-Seltzer® we might have been spared all this hooey but now we have to hear every nitwit hick with a modicum of bible learnin' bloviate on how now is the time when it all ends, doo-dah.

To the credit of the History Channel piece (which seemed to minimize shilling for evangelicals despite the popularity of that sport these days), they did mention several times that, well, these predictions have been ongoing for about 2,000 years. Of course, what comes to mind is the boy calling wolf and one would think folks might have caught on by now. Except, these are the same people who believe everything there is was cooked up about 5,000 years ago in less than a week's time, every animal on earth was collected onto a ship the size of a neighborhood Jiffy Lube, and that a zygote carries the same rights as a human. So it's probably not much of a stretch to imagine they're going to get bit every twenty years by what's essentially, "made you look!"

My own end times is fast approaching as I ready my humble abode for the return of the wee ones. Get some laundry done (and get it put away), re-hide daddy's candy stash, re-file this past weekend's stack of CDs. Daddy knows how to be proactive when dealing with empirically verifiable disasters. I just can't be bothered by bad dreams.
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Less than a week left to get in on the Mixmania! fun so let me know if you want to add a mix to the mix (and please email me your postal address). I don't think my beastly behavior at last night's Genuine Bash gained any converts but we've got over 20 players now, so it should be interesting.

On a sad note, I found out about the demise of one of my favorite blogs, Candygenius (although she promises/threatens to be back soon). Cindy has been one of the funniest and formidable foes of comment-spammers and she will be sorely missed. She was also one of my first fans and I owe her a mountain of gratitude.

6 comments:

Karen said...

Wow... I guess I left before the bash got really good? With you and Genuine being wounded? LOL!

Have a good day!

lu said...

the end is near... jim, hurry! hurry! Sooooo much to do and so little time.

Hank said...

The best bumper sticker I've ever seen (stuck onto the back of incredibly rusty Subaru): Come the Rapture can I have your car?

My current hypothesis is that the Rapture has already occurred, but nobody got called up to heaven because God is in a really crappy mood.

seeingdouble said...

Why bother with laundry and such? THE END IS NEAR!! Repent! Or, blog and do chores, it's almost as good as a few Hail Marys and Our Fathers. Ok, if I wasn't going to hell before, I've probably just sealed the deal. Bah....

Genuine said...

The rapture happened during the bash....shit we missed it.

Busy Mom said...

I wondered what was going on with Cindy. I'll miss her!