Showing posts with label me me meme. Show all posts
Showing posts with label me me meme. Show all posts

Friday, November 17, 2006

More on me, moron me

A couple weeks ago, The Zero Boss provided some sound advice for bloggers who desire traffic - whatever that means. My guess is that if I'm going to toss off into the tubes of the internets, I might as well actually find readers, something beyond a few family members and the shit picklers in human resources. Jay makes some great points I think - considering Da Boss gets more hits in a minute than I get in a month, yeah, I oughta' listen to the man. Indeed, with the whiny tone of my last post, one would think I'd put Jay's advice to the service of being Teh Awesome Single Dad blog sensation slash studmuffin (all righteous motivation) or something. It's gotta work better than what's amounting to my role as toilet-paper stuck to the bottom of a shoe at next year's BlogHer will be confirmed as friends introduce me around to the blank looks that signal "Who?"

Serves me right: what Jay suggests seems to have slipped past me much in the same way his advice to buy IBM was pooh-poohed by me back in the 1940's. Anyway, the suggestions and my failures:
Write regularly. Daily is best, but at least two to three times a week is fine.

More shit, only shittier. I can do that.
Keep posts short and pithy at first.

Damn, I screwed this one from the start and I must have assumed Jay had a lisp with the "pithy" thing.
Be a regular reader of other blogs.

I really - REALLY - try to do this, I swear. Do this and wonder how much it benefits my own writing (or whatever you want to call what I do) and well...
Comment on other people’s blogs.

I am sooooo bad at this. I read other people's blogs and then I'm stuck with the dilemma of writing - what? - "well said, my friend, ha ha, been there a million times, good luck with that, um yes, hmmmmm."
Link to great posts by other bloggers. Add your own meaningful thoughts to the discussion. They’ll notice you linking to them, will read you, and may even link to you (or at least add you to their feed reader) in return.

Hey Jay! WAAAAAZZZ-ZZZZUP HOMIE!!!

What's left is far too tech-y for me to pass on to people more stupid than me which is... heh,

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Vultus est index animi

Something I’m coming to terms with in having this blog is that I feel I owe something to my handful of loyal readers. To be honest, I’ve never understood why anyone takes an interest in this slow-motion train wreck other than to play the Secret Santa mix game I organize. Yes, I write well enough (enough to achieve stardom as the wacky columnist of a backwater newspaper, probably) but that hardly seems the reason. Yet read I am and not just because they got here googling “upskirt pics” or “how to unscrew the lid of an Ocean Spay juice bottle and keep skin on your hand”. I get a lot of hits for the “Back Yardigans” on one of the first things I posted on Patriside and one or two of those readers actually still stick around (apparently the Back Yardigans are huge in Latin America). Something keeps a twisted few intrigued.

Maybe it’s the way it takes me forever to say something. As in, the reason I haven’t been posting much lately has to do issues not involving ropes, jello, or mounds of cocaine.

Obviously, the election (especially that last month when the media tried to turn it into a squeaker) had me busy and preoccupied. Fortunately for all of us, I wasn’t the only American who felt that things weren’t just swell with the nation. A week after the votes were counted, it’s apparent that the GOP continues its streak of fucking up, the inertia of screwing the pooch (and hot man-on-man sex) too much for the brakes. That crew has leapt the curb and is skidding across the lawn, straight for Junior’s bedroom.

More than that, though, has been the wretched past few weeks at work. I started writing this post last Friday but I was beat up, sore, my hands swollen and my knuckles sore, a bruised rib throbbing every time I took in a breath.

The thing I hate the most about my job is a kid so out of control that he needs to be restrained. For two months I had been lucky, the guys in my cabin were going along great, I had probably been involved in two restraints that whole time. Last week I was involved in a restraint every day, three on of those days. Sunday I was involved in six restraints (though to be fair to My Kids, I was being called to other cabins to help out). After shifts like those I’m drained, physically and emotionally; I can’t read, I can’t write, I can only turn on some tunes and decompress.

Then, get up and do it again, amen. Except, the low pay and time it takes from my kids has made my mornings/early afternoons before my shift a grind of cranking out cover letters and sending out resumes. And searching, oy the searching.

The least I can do is offer that explanation to you intrepid angels who keep checking me for an update along witha heartfelt thanks for being so faithful. I wish I could promise to be better about updating but that’s not happening, at least for a couple of weeks. For those of you who are waiting for the next mixmania! theme, I’ll try to get that posted by Friday but again, no promises.

Until this all works itself out, I hope you’ll keep checking with me to see if I’ve poked something up from the slot in my hidey-hole. I can promise this: whatever I shove out into the light of day won’t be something I shouldn’t have eaten. I wouldn't do that to you fine people.